So. If you have news or have funny posts on Facebook, you'll have to email or text it to me. I think I'm going to avoid the news feed for quite some time. Which means, if you don't tell me, I won't know.
There's just too much making me sad, and even if I scroll quickly and pretend I didn't see it, I still saw it. And sometimes, like today, I just can't keep my mouth shut.
I'm a conservative American.
I'm not a freak.
I don't believe in NO government.
I don't believe in a lot of the things that are said that I believe in.
Which is a problem for me. Because that's one of my huge buttons. One of the easiest ones to push. To say I said, think, feel, or did something I didn't do.
Hell, I'm still heart broken that one of my siblings lied about me before my dad's funeral. I feel sick when I think about someone actually saying that about me. Ok. Here it is. I did not lie about Will's arrival so that we could have dad's funeral a certain day so that Doug could be there. It is ridiculous. Doug getting time off is no big deal. If we needed the funeral to be Saturday, then he would have simply texted his boss and said he needed a few more days. No biggie. His father-in-law just died. We had to travel. He could have gotten more time off so easy.
To say that I'd lie about that...grrr....
To say that I'd lie about my dad's funeral...grrrrrrrr.....
To say that I'd lie about my brother, who is in a war zone....oh, I'll take you town for that one. I don't believe in good karma, but I sure do believe in bad karma. And I'd never do that towards my baby brother. Ever. Stupid. The thought never even entered my mind.
So someone ... who knows ... because the people that do know, won't say ... made up a load of crap in their head and then they spread it.
Kind of leaves me wondering who to trust. Who thinks that little of me. And I ought to just let it go, but it still really hurts. So, there. Some of my dirty laundry. Aired. Here. Who knows, maybe I'll work on exposing more lies. Maybe it'll be good therapy for me.
Either which way.
If I did it. If I said it. If I thought it. If I feel it. It's mine. The good, the bad, the ugly. I have no one to blame but myself.
That's big. That's huge.
It's one of my biggest buttons to push.
And right now, Facebook tells me all sorts of things about myself that simply aren't true.
So after a few defending posts...I made a final one and now, as difficult as it will be, I will not comment again. Because it does no good. I tell you I don't believe something, I expect you to believe me. And when you refuse...I need to figure out how to disengage...because mourning my dad is hitting me hard...and so I'm already so-very-sad. And when someone I love won't hear me, that just makes the sad too much for right now.
________, we're just going to have to agree to strongly disagree. I hate the direction our country is heading. I hate the changes that have happened to my life via the government in the past five years. I hate that my president and his wife apologize for our country, that she publicly says that she's not proud of being an American. I hate that the people in control are more concerned with what they will get out of it rather than what is best for my life, for my daughters' lives, for my future grandchildren. I hate that D.C. isn't working on halting our borrowing. I hate the "GIMMEE" mentality that is growing in our country. I hate that my husband works and works and we have less than a bunch of folks that take advantage of the system. I hate that employees have to pass drug tests but people getting public assistance don't automatically have to do so. I hate that back room deals are done. I hate that bills are passed full of earmarks. I hate that the liberties that my ancestors all the way back to the Civil War, the Revolutionary War fought for, that my brother is in Afghanistan while his family are here, that my nephew went to war, that my dad went to war...I hate that they are being trampled on. I hate that I have no voice. I hate the idea of those who cannot even manage Social Security being in charge of running insurance options for some. I hate the idea that we won't get the monies we paid into Social Security back. I hate when people tell me I need to give up my guns. I hate when people demand diversity and respect but when my opinion is different than theirs, all of a sudden, diversity and respect don't matter. I hate when I see mismanagement of our tax dollars, those ought to be held sacred and spent with respect towards their fellow citizens instead of just thrown around on stupid things. I hate that they just print money. I hate that there's a group of wealthy individuals getting poorer folks to believe that wealthy people are bad, just not those rich folks, it's the other ones. I don't want a socialist government. People aren't entitled to stuff. People are entitled to liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Their pursuit. Not a pursuit that is handed to them, because that is not happiness. Freedom, liberty, charity, kindness, being decent, respecting others rights as I want mine to be respected...I don't agree with everyone, but that's okay. I expect the same allowances in return, and am disheartened when it doesn't happen.
I am not a republican. I am not a democrat. I am a citizen of the United States of America. I'll never vote a straight party line. I vote for who I hope has a backbone to stand up for what is right. Again...love you ________...I'll show that by not reading anymore here so I can just hush up on your page.
Now I'm going to go listen to me some Keith Urban singing me some, "Tonight I Wanna Cry".