25 October 2014


Question #3:  What makes someone kind?  How could you be kinder this year?

Whoo boy...this is a loaded question...or rather, a loaded answer.  I'm not looking ahead at these questions.  Perhaps I ought to be so I can think on these before blogging...but...oh well.  This is what I started.  We'll just keep on keeping on without a long and deep thought process.

To the first part...what makes someone kind...

The first thing that came to my mind was telling my daughters it doesn't hurt them to smile at people.  So smile.  It doesn't hurt to say hi...it doesn't hurt to be nice...

It might not be fun...but it doesn't hurt me as a person to be kind.

When I am acknowledged.  A nod, a wave, a greeting, a smile, high five...whatever.  Just acknowledge my existence.  In a positive way.

When they remember something about me.  Shows they pay attention and put forth the energy to actually remember it.  AND...then they acted on it by letting me know.

When they go out of their way to do something for me...or just doing something even if it's not out of their way...  No one has to do anything for me, but how nice when they do...

Sometimes, it's nice to be given something.  On Wednesday, a lady gave me a late birthday present.  She said it wasn't much... I opened it and was delighted!  Still am.  I needed something.  This has been a long hard week...and I needed something.  This "little something" was just perfect.  And she didn't have to do that.  How nice!

Kindness is just being decent.  Minding one's manners.  Giving someone the benefit of the doubt.  Looking at a situation from their viewpoint, or if one can't, then just accepting that there might be another viewpoint...different doesn't mean wrong.  Kindness is learning that skill of empathy.  And using it.  Seeing the good in people.  Seeing the worth in everyone.  Giving without expectation of anything being given in return.

Just be nice.

The second part of today's question...how can I be kinder this year...?

*arm raised and waving*

I know!  I know!!!

Well...I can quit my griping.  I can just do and accept that I'm doing.  Be grateful for the life I have that makes it so I can.  I can just shut my mouth.

And make more cookies and bread for people.

Shut my mouth.  Bake.  Share. 

That's the basics.  I know where I fall short.  I try to be kind...but I can do better.  In my head and in my heart.  And shut my mouth.

Know what the really cool thing is?  I can completely go to Heavenly Father in prayer and have a conversation about me and my mouth.  Me and my attitude.  And he hears.  He understands.  He has a great deal of patience for me.  He gives me more growing opportunities than I like, but...that's okay.  He wants me to be happy...I just need to get in line with his plan...

And kindness is part of that.  I've been having the primary song going in my head while I've sat here typing:

I want to be kind to everyone for that is right you see... So I say to myself, remember this... Kindness begins with me...

Then there's that great commandment:  Love one another as I have loved you.

Jesus was kind.

Almost all of us can be kinder.

24 October 2014

Flashback Friday

July 2010

Touring RES as it was getting closer to being finished...

23 October 2014

Not Always...

"Thursday is a good day!"

That's the saying around here.

Today...not so much.

It's been a long busy week.  The busy part is fine...but I just want to stay home and take care of unpacking (okay, i don't want to unpack, but i need to do more unpacking...).  Tomorrow, I'm staying home.  For the most part.  *knock on wood*

So I wake up today.  And I'm thinking of my to-do list for this week.  And there's no way I'm getting it all done.  But I don't know what to put off...and I putter around and then head out...

But during those morning hours, I find out more family stuff.

And my heart is just sad.  And my eyes leak.

And I wish I could go back there and fix everything.

And I cannot.

So I sit here.  And worry.  And fret.  And talk to my older brother.  And ...  feel ... scared... sad... 

I hope.

I hope.

I hope and pray.

Dinner Time

Why did I not look at the questions before I started this?


I do not like this question...

Question #2: If you could have dinner with any person from history, who would you choose?

I've heard this question before.  I roll my eyes at it.  And now I need an answer...

Jesus is the obvious answer.

Let's go beyond that....

The next few names that entered my head were Dalai Lama...he has brilliant wise things to say...

Mother Teresa...

Joseph Smith Jr.

Brittany would fly here if I had Audrey Hepburn over...

Then...because I was feeling all clumsy in my thinking...and because I don't think deceased family members count for this question...although, Eve would be an interesting person to talk with...and, of course, if it was anyone, I would have my mom for a loud, fun, LOOONNNNGGGG dinner, but this said history, so I was thinking historically...

And my brain goes back to Jesus...and then, I thought...

Oh!  Mary Magdalene.

I think I might have a lot of interest in what she has to say.

I could come up with a long list...from Ronald Reagan to Jason Robards to Erik the Red to Annie Oakley...but now I'm thinking back to Eve again...

So.  Mary Magdalene.

Or Eve.

Final answer.

22 October 2014

Hardest Thing

We have 25 questions coming our way.

Why?  Because.

I may not have perfect answers, it'll just be what comes to mind.  Feel free to play along in the comments....not about me, about you... ☺

Question #1:  What is the hardest thing you've ever done?

Things that come to mind:
- Fighting the seemingly never ending battle called depression...
- Natural childbirth.  Three times.
- Move when I was 14.  15.  16.  Again multiples times as an adult and doing that to my daughters...being new sucks.
- Various family situations.
- Showing up when I'd rather do anything but.

But, I think...and perhaps it's because of all the different things that poured into it... I think the hardest thing I've ever done was telling my daughters that their father was dead.

Because I knew as soon as those words were out of my mouth their lives would change.

I knew that they would never go back to how it was a second before.

I knew that opportunities would be gone from them.

I knew that mourning is absolute hell and the process takes years and years and then it's still a part of you.  I know the empty spot in my soul that won't be filled until I see my parents again.

I knew this would bring back a world full of emotions and memories...wishes and hopes...

And...because, even though these are three self-sufficient adults, they are still my babies.

Hardest thing I've ever done.

I did it.  But it took everything I had.  And then to leave them a few weeks later, when all I wanted was to stay and be there for them.  Be able to watch over them and see with my own eyes how they were doing.

I've had more than a boatload of hardest things in my life thus far.  I'll have more.  Hardest things suck.  But we survive.  Even if we need to climb in bed for a few days.  We survive.

19 October 2014

And Then We Moved...

so we moved.

things became real when the sign went up...

doug and i decided to move a load over every day instead of doing it all in one day...it made sense at the time...many times while we were doing this, we wondered about this decision...especially towards the end when it seems like it will NEVER EVER END!!!

the missionaries helped with a few of the heavier things, like the piano...here was my empty spot, when i was still living in one place and my piano was waiting a few weeks for me at the new place...

sometimes, after unloading the truck, doug would play a game of pool over at the new place.  a reward of sorts.  he's a good sport.  tried to do most of it to protect my joints.  he's my moving hero.

we got the patio stuff set up...

the guest room ready for visitors...

the sucky part of being a mormon with food storage is moving all those cans.  they're still not re-organized...i'm doing really good at letting go and letting them be for now...

then came the day we moved our bed over and switched residences...most of our stuff was moved.  

i got a bonus!  the prior tenants left a dog bone cookie cutter in a corner of a cupboard.  yeah for me!  i didn't have that one!

two of the missionaries climbed my new tree on the last heavy stuff trip.  they were great help and then we had a major fire grilling hamburgers...good times!

apparently, i set this as an alarm on my phone...i do not remember doing so...but when it popped up, i was slightly humored by my earlier self...because, i was home.  instead of driving 13 more minutes.  glad i stuck to the schedule! 

we had a ton of boxes left over.  the good news is we didn't have as much stuff as we thought?  the back of the pick up was filled with flattened boxes...squashed and tied down.

then came the day to say goodbye to the old place...it was a good home...

and on to the next... next spring, i shall relearn to swim in the pool...

p.s.  i still hate moving.  perhaps things will follow the plan and the next one will be to our alaska cabin...  and, major kudos to my moving hero hubby...for his patience with my limitations and quirks about packing, moving, unpacking and finding the new home for stuff...

17 October 2014

Flashback Friday

May 2010

The Paul McCartney Fund

(back in early 2010, i told jaycey about my friend posting that if every one of his friends would send him a dollar, he'd have enough for the new...i think ipad?  anyway...she and i both did that.  he laughed.  we may have been the only ones who sent him a buck.  ...when she found out sir paul was going to be in her neck of the woods...she asked if she could post that.  i said why not.  and she did.  and some of her people donated.  then her momma may or may not have subsidized the rest, but only after some awesome people played her game.  and then her awesome momma found where we could get better seats for less.  and then her awesome cousin said she'd buy a ticket also so she didn't have to go alone.  and then, jaycey had the concert of her life while a beatle sang to her.  yes.  he sang to her.  and don't ever tell her any different.)